A lesson of empahy

I hate it when people make me wait one whole day for an outing only to put airplane at the end of the day. In my opinion, it's one the worst things that you can do to a person. I mean, what can be worse than making a person wait in high anticipation, putting his time on hold, keeping in suspense and devoid him of chance to enjoy his hour doing other things and at the end, make him feel that he has wasted his whole day.
The very fact that there is no scheduled timing makes it all the more harder to make use of the waiting time. To add salt in wound, never bother to inform him that the appointment is already cancelled some time ago.

I am crrently on a book called Social Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. Social intelligence is made up of Social Awareness (including empathy, attunement, empathic accuracy, and social cognition) and Social Facility (including synchrony, self-presentation, influence, and concern). Everyone has the capability to 'feel' for other people you are interacting with, only if you actually give attention to him. That's why are able to emphatise with the less fortunate. However, we are also able to 'tune out' those empathy consciously.

there are 2 kinds of interactions, I-IT and I-YOU. In I-IT, that is no attunement to the person you are interacting with, and there is no real empathy involved. Only enough attention is given to keep the conversation on track. This is true in situation where you want to feel emphatise but the other person gave you hollow gesture(words with no emotions) because he is either distracted or doesn't connect to you. I-YOU however, is the complete opposite. Differnt situation called for different interactions like police with criminal should not let his own feelings cloud his judgement and therefore I-YOU is not exactly appropriate.

Social intelligence is more important than IQ. Just look around the corporate world, those with high social intelligence usually gets the job because they are more effective in attuning to the needs of the bosses and clients and people around him.

Which explains why i am so angry in paragraph one. There's no empathy felt from the other party and certainly no damage control(ie. do something after making me upset for waiting whole day instead of making situation worse by cancelling appointment).

I am not saying I am good social intelligence. I certainly has alot more to learn. Now that i am more aware of the subject, i find it very interesting to look around my working environment and learn from people's mistakes. For me as a rule of thumb, anything that i don't like, most probably others don't. We just need to make more effort to feel. Like the old adage, "put yourself in others shoes".